This is a review from Casey, Chris, and Jackie about Borderlands: The Pre-Sequel, which came out on PS4, PC, and Xbox 360 on October 14th, 2014. Being one of our favorite video game franchises of all time, we thought that one review wouldn’t be enough to explain to you the glory of this PRE-SEQUEL. We love made up words!

When I first played the original Borderlands, I had no idea what I was about to be in for. The cover with one of the Psycho’s looking like he shot himself in the head was oddly confusing, and moreso intriguing. Why was he shooting himself? Why does he look like a reject from a Mad Max film? What was this robot on the cover and why do I instantly want to put him in a tract  compacter? I finally was able to answer all these questions throughout my time with the game and by the end, I loved everything that had to do with Pandora and Gearbox and 2K Games.

By the time of the second installment, I was pumped up. Chris and I had spent many hours as padawan Vault Hunters and needed some bigger game; and boy did we get it. Borderlands 2 continues to be a bonding experience with us, as we go from location to location throughout Pandora. All the while, Tiny Tina and Handsome Jack are exchanging quips about Butt Stallions. Borderlands 01We only recently finished the last bit of DLC, the game is basically never-ending!

When Myrrick told me about the Pre-Sequel for attending the panel at PAX East, I couldn’t be more excited. You would be on the Moon, where you could jump with anti-gravity bravado and butt stomp your enemies as you joined forces with Handsome Jack on an adventure. What more could I want? Well, not much else to be quite honest with you.

I haven’t had a chance to finish the game yet, but I’ve played enough to know that I love it. The new gameplay mechanics add as much frustration at times, as they do fun. Just ask anyone about that first boss battle. But as you continue to go on, and you’re character gets better with Skill Points; so do you at aiming a sniper at an enemy whilst floating in the air fifty feet above them.

The humor is still there, and I’ve read complaints about the characters not talking as much; but I don’t think Nisha has shut up once since we starting our trek across Elpis. I’m not saying this is a bad thing! Her little insights, along with the familiar characters who are hearing the story of the Gladiator, Athena, along with you;; are both hilarious and engaging at the same time.

The graphics continue with the cell-shading, be it a little richer than the previous installments. The controls don’t differ from the other games. The big difference is the jumping mechanics, as well as freeze and laser guns. The game is the same as the others with only minor improvements that make it completely enjoyable. You got a game that is the equivalent of Shadows of the Empire for Star Wars; and that’s about the best compliment I could give it.


Listen, if looting and shooting isn’t your thing, then WHY THE *#^$ DO YOU EVEN ATTEMPT PLAY THESE GAMES?!! WHY DO YOU BUY A SEQUEL, OR PRE-SEQUEL TO A GAME YOU DIDN’T LIKE THE FIRST TIME AROUND?! ISN’T THAT THE DEFINITION OF BEING CLINICALLY INSANE??!!??!! I am not going to sit here and tell you this game does something brand new and inventive, OH WAIT IT DOES!! Another thing I AM SICK OF!!! HAVE YOU EVEN PLAYED THIS GAME?! Have you noticed that the mechanics of it ARE COMPLETELY DIFFERENT BECAUSE OF THE NEW LOACTION?! I would say this is pretty F*#@&)@* IMPRESSIVE AND DIFFERENT!! But hey, for those of you who don’t like things like laughing, butt-slamming, jumping RIDICULOUS distances, then I suggest you do something different, like GO PAINT A HOUSE OR PLAY JACKS WITH YOUR LITTLE SISTER!! YOUR LIFE IS UNINTERESTING!!! STOP PUTTING DOWN ONE OF THE BEST FPS EXPERIENCES I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED!!! Another big critique from said suck-wads is, why didn’t this game come out for next-gen consoles?! CUZ YOU ARE NOT THAT SPECIAL!!!! 2K gave this game to the Australians so they could gift us with the magic that is the Pre-sequel while you babies SIT IN THE CORNER AND CRY ABOUT HOW YOU SOLD YOUR OLD SYSTEM!!! Mr TorgueWell you are S*%& OUTTA LUCK and will have to wait for Borderlands 3 to be announced, which I’m sure the real 2K is working on now as I FURIOUSLY TYPE THIS REVIEW!!!

One thing that is REALLY different, this time around, is the use of oxygen. Annoying at times yes, BUT ANOTHER THING THAT IS DIFFERENT AND SOMETHING YOU HAVE TO MASTER!! THOUGH I DON’T PUT IT PAST MANY OF YOU THAT YOU ARE  NOT SMART ENOUGH TO HANDLE THIS CONCEPT!! The great thing about it is that these Oz packs (you’ll find out why they are called that) ALSO enhance your character! From making them shoot better, to more grenade badassery, all-in-all it’s AWESOME to have another way to mod out your character! OH AND YOUR CHARACTER TALKS THIS TIME AROUND!! People are saying that they don’t, THEY ARE STUPID $@*#%’s AND SHOULD BE DISINTEGRATED!!! HOLY *#%#-NUT SACKS YOU CAN FREEZE PEOPLE!!! HOW DOES IT GET ANY BETTER THAN THAT?!?!?!?!? IT DOESN’T!!!!!!! The bad guys are a little different this time, but they are generally the same classes. THERE ARE STILL CRAZY MIDGETS THAT NEED THEIR HEADS BLOWN OFF, SO GET TO IT! My favorite is to shoot them in their helmet so that it shatters and they run out of oxygen, ASPHYXIATION IS NEXT TO GODLINESS! So get out there a BE SOMEBODY VAULT HUNTER!!

If you are a seasoned Vault Hunter and happen to have save files from the previous 2 games then you will be HAPPY AS BALLS!!! 2K will reward you with Moonstones so you can buy plenty of bullets to shoot the $&%* OUT OF EVERYTHING IN YOUR PATH!! Golden Keys are back so keep it tooned to the Borderlands social medias like THE FACEBOOKS or THE TWITTERS so you can get those Shift Codes for Concordia! There are plenty of fun cameos this time around, but I think one of the best things is being able to play as Clap Trap! That crazy-ass robot is finally in your hands and he is as DYSFUNCTIONAL AS EVER!! 2K Australia does a bang up job creating new Vault Hunter classes for this third outing, giving us a good deviation from the gameplay of the first two games, SOMETHING THAT MOST PEOPLE TAKE FOR GRANTED!!! Our good friend Handsome Jack is back BECAUSE THIS ONE HAPPENS IN BETWEEN THE FIRST TWO GAMES!!!! WHAT A GODDAMN *%#U-SACK CONCEPT!!! He’s a hero this time around so be ready for his FACE TO BE INTACT! Maybe we will get to see the point when he goes BAT-*&@^ CRAZY!!!


~CynicNerd aka Mr Torgue

To be clear, I’ve been watching this title like a proud parent ever since the email from 2K came to me before Pax East 2014. I watched in awe at the magnificence during the preview and followed its evolution on YouTube right up until the game was released.

I’m still pretty early in (personal circumstances prevented me from playing until Saturday) but I’ve seen enough to know this is gonna be awesome. (Maya, The Siren, also my cat, tried to type that as aweksome, which could be a thing, but not in this review)Borderlands 02 A friend who is also familiar with the series and has been my partner in space crime commented “It’s possible 2k Australia does Borderlands better than 2k America” within the intro.

There is a little bit of weird glitchiness from my gameplay (my character sometimes randomly gets ported out of buildings and ends up outside) but overall it’s a damn stable game. It takes all the things that we loved in Borderlands 2 and turns them up a few notches with things like team banter, freezing cryoweapons and lasers (pew pew). I’m also slowly, but frustratingly, falling in love with the CL4P-TRAP ability ‘vaulthunter.exe’ which forces your entire party to adopt abilities that may deplete your ammo, might piss you off, or may cause you to bounce uncontrollably in zero gravity. It’s not malware, it’s a feature.

And despite the disturbing likability of Handsome Jack as the game begins, his descent into jackassery has begun. When you meet him, he’s a low-level programmer for the Hyperion Corporation and…doesn’t wear a mask. And he’s looking for a few good vault hunters to help him (where have we heard that line before, I wonder.)

If you’re looking for some spectacular deviation from Borderlands and Borderlands 2, you may be disappointed. And if you are…well then I don’t know what to tell you. Otherwise, we’ll see you on Elpis.